Sometimes
I start to think of what could have been
You never blink, so the world flickers back at you
It looks at you, and then it shuts down
Sometimes
I start to think of what is
Have you ever dreamt of living or crossing it off your list?
You breathe but you are dying with every breath.
And you thought love was the only contradiction alive
Sometimes
I start to think of what was
This one time you called for red, I gave you your own blood to taste
Not like you could tell the difference, not like you ever will
For cynics preach sacrifice, you sought defiance too
Sometimes
I start to think of what will be
The constellations will go crazy, the rings will catch fire
You will call me by some other name and for that I will despise you forever
We will visit ancient ruins and try to find ourselves in the past
The bookmarks will fade into the words, and we will be lost forever
Sometimes
I start to think, but then I stop
And I have to start all over again
Bickering thoughts and tangerine tongues, I forgive you every time
When I see your velvet lips and those burning eyes
Don’t I forgive you every time?
Sometimes
I think about breaking in
If you sing eulogies to the night and hymns to the mornings
The tone deaf skies will stir from their silence
Don’t ask me how the notes are embroidered into those clouds
You wrote ballads and blues, and you turned me into music
Sometimes
I break in
I make you dry your tears on concrete, till you promise to buy me back
I make you walk on wet tiles, till you balance the beams of your words
I tell you to pose like a muse for his poet, like a prophet to the agnostic
Sometimes
I think about breaking through
Of writing about the food that’s in my fridge.
Of talking to strangers and fidgeting with the disposition of colours
Sometimes
You ask me about my business, what I have in mind
And I tell you that I sell mirrors
in the city of the blind
(Last stanza is by Urdu Poet Daagh
“Kya Poochho ho hall merey karobaar ka
Aaeeney bechta hoon andhon ke sheher mein.”)
7 Feb 2011
